I’m not a religious person. Some of you may have picked this up from reading my blog. This is probably the only time you’re going to hear me talk about God. I’m not atheist though. I grew up without the presence of a church in my life. Please don’t comment about how I need God in my life. I am not a fan of most organized religions. I have many reasons for this. One of the largest is that all I see is conflict surrounding the subject. I’m no expert here, but I’m pretty sure if there is a God he doesn’t want us killing each other over how to worship him. For this reason, I decline to participate. I’m also not sure what I believe right now. I feel as I grow older I will be able to make those decisions for myself, not have a book make them for me.
I brought up religion because I wanted to talk about fate and regrets. I read a lot of blogs where people explain everything that happens to them as “God’s plan”. I think this is ludicrous. However, I do think things happen to us for a reason. I believe we go through bad experiences so we can learn from them and develop into better human beings. These are just my opinions. I’m not speaking in facts right now. I’m just explaining how I feel about the subject. I’m pretty sure some higher power didn’t have me fall in love with P just to teach me a few lessons. However, I do think that it is important for me to understand what happened and why. Calling it fate or saying God wanted it to happen and that’s why it did is just an excuse. You’ll keep making the same mistakes if that’s what is running through your head.
I don’t regret any of the decisions I’ve made in life. That is one burden I will not allow my conscience to bear. Do I think some of them were stupid? Absolutely. Do I feel guilty when I think about some of my past actions? Even more so. However, there are no regrets here. Why? Because every stupid thing I’ve done or said played a part in developing me into who I am today. And I like who I am, flaws and all. I could spend a lot of time brooding over why I got back together with P the first time we broke up. But what would that accomplish? Nothing, except making me feel bad about myself. I don’t need that. Which is why I don’t carry regret with me. However, when I make a poor choice I do consider what I could have done differently. I think that’s very important.
I’m not trying to tell anyone out there how to live their life. I don’t feel as though I’m in a position to do that. I really don’t think anyone is because we are all different. We all need to be free to make our own decisions about how to live our lives. I write this blog to talk about me personally and no one else. If you agree with my philosophies, I’m glad. If you don’t, that’s okay too. That’s the beauty of human beings. We are all capable of thinking and developing our own ideas, if we so choose.