Lost Souls In Need Of Healing


I read a lot of other blogs. I like to comment, because I know how good I feel when I get a comment from somebody. I also feel like it’s another way I can contribute to this site. I tend to read blogs focused on Personal life, because that’s what I write about too. But the more I read, the more worried I become. The more I realize how this world is filled with people who are hurting. For some, the pain has been inflicted by others. For others, their very own minds are working against them.

I’m a biologist. I do neuroscience research. I’m here to tell you we know so very little about how our brain functions. I’ve read posts by people that are clearly insane. I’ve also read posts by people contemplating suicide. It certainly is a dark world I dabble in. But the more I see, the more I desire to help. I have a feeling of helplessness right now, because I can do so little for these people. I try to leave kind comments. From personal experience, I know those can help turn your day around. But there’s a certain point where you just have to hope that they are capable of helping themselves. That they have the perseverance to push through it. Sadly, a lot of people don’t and a lot of people will give up.

I can understand the desire to give up when you feel as though your own brain is functioning against you. When what you want more then anything in the world is to be happy, but you just can’t achieve it. I’ve been in that place. I know how dark it is. I found a way out just with my own willpower. But I know for some people that’s not enough. So they go on antidepressants and expect them to make them feel better. But they don’t always work, because we know so little about them. It’s quite a hopeless and frustrating subject for me. I want to help. But how can we really? We don’t understand what goes on in someone else’s mind. No matter how hard they try and explain it to me, I’ll never be able to fully comprehend what they are feeling.

I feel like if I get into medical school, I’m going to end up in some sort of neuroscience/psychiatry research. I also have a lot of thoughts on drugs and addiction but I’m going to need to save those for another post. I truly do have a yearning desire to understand the brain and how it functions. Maybe, one day, I’ll be able to.

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10 thoughts on “Lost Souls In Need Of Healing

  1. I find neuroanatomy fascinating. I’m not even scientifically inclined, but my interest in psychology has me wanting a textbook of neuroanatomy and function.

    Yes, we know so little about the brain. I think it’s almost dangerous to use anti-depressants because of the effects they have that we don’t know about. And, of course, all anti-depressants have nasty side effects. In the words of one of my favourite lecturers “Those aren’t side effects they’re the bloody effects!!!”

    The use of medicine to help with mental illness is controversial to me. As a Freudian I believe that talk therapy is much more useful. If you have a panic attack it’s for a reason. If you take a pill, like I have been for the past 14 years you just put a band-aid on. You never confront or reveal the reason for the panic attack and can never reach a catharticc state of resolution. That said, there is the argument for chemical imbalance, and Panic Disorder, which is what I have may not be linked to entirely psychological things, but biological things. I do know that atleast half has to do with psychological themes that I’ll never get to explore or ‘face’ because I’ve chosen the pharmaceutical route.

    And of course I have to think of the very severe illnesses like Bipolar. I have met many people with this illness and it’s scary and so uncontrollable. I’d say it’s worse than some forms of Schizophrenia. And yes, medications do help these people although they often aren’t compliant because they like the feeling of being manic. It’s a tough call.

    And yes, we are all broken. We all have broken hearts to some degree. When we have empathy for others it breeds love into the world. When you leave a comment you give a little love. It does make my day to get a comment. It makes me want to hug you, know you, sit down to a cup of tea with you. I hope that’s not wrong. But in such a cold world a little love can go a long way.

    • Thank you for such a long and heartfelt comment. I know about Bipolar disorder. My grandmother has it. We always fear that she will stop taking her medication again. But I find that even while she’s on it, she still has mood swings that are much stronger then the average person. Which is why I share your skepticism about medicating for mental illness. I really feel like we need to strive to understand it better, instead of just marketing drugs that kind of help for money.

  2. I like to read other posts because it gives me a sort of guage for myself. I read the book the brain that changes itself earlier last year. Very interesting stuff. Although I am not sure if the goal was to sell that expensive program they were speaking of or not.
    I appreciate comments on my blog as well. I started it as a form of therapy to help me thorough this depression I am feeling. I purposefully did not invite any friends to my blog because I want all my thoughts to be amongst strangers. I was on vacation for 11 days and in those days broke it off for good with that person I was dating, and only left my house 3 days for a few hours each time. The rest of the time I was in bed writing. I wrote farewell lover and one other post. I have been depressed and just the mere thought of “him” made me burst in tears. This morning I went digging in my drawer for this prescription I had for wellbutrin the doctor gave me for smoking cessation. I took one this morning. Might be psychosomatic but at the end of the day I felt better. I didn’t think I could function at work. At least 4 times I welled up at work but no tears were shed.
    The world is a crazy place. No matter how bad I feel though, suicide is not an option. Not that I wouldn’t want to be taken out of this misery I am in but I wouldn’t want to cause any for others in my life (kids, siblings, parents etc)

  3. I’m a young college student, I’m studying Sociology and I found this entry very interesting. I agree with you, the world is hurting and there is nothing to be done about it. Yes, you can take pills, and yes you can go to therapy. What about the people who don’t have the resources or what about the people who have the resources but are so ill, they can’t see the reason to live. I hope you go on to find information on the brain and why some people think like they do. Thanks for sharing!

  4. While I don’t have much interest in psych patients (I work in a hospital, haha, we actually call them “med clearance patients”), I do feel for them. My best friend is bipolar and while I hate it for her, I’m grateful to see it from such a close perspective so I can understand my patients better. It’s horrible and ugly. People get so mad at the moms who come in on meth and their children are neglected, but they’re addicted. They made a mistake and it ended up costing them years on their lives and their children’s. I need to go to bed, but I read again :o)

  5. http://everything2.com/title/Hermetic

    I immediately thought of this thread when I read the first part of your blog…I don’t want to add more grief, but I feel that it is somewhat relevant to where the spirit of your post is. Be warned: it’s a difficult read. Sad… and brutal…

    There is a lot of grief out there, but there are the few that try to make changes where they can. Whether it be by listening, intervention, or just being a true friend.

    Perhaps in reading this, folks can…can what…? Be more empathetic, or understanding? More in tune to the hairs starting to go perpendicular to the skin on the back of their necks? I dunno. Some people can hide severe depression quiet well, and others can sense it just as easily. I’ve had to take rounds from a friend while stationed in Iraq just based off of that “gut feeling” but the same guy recently got married to the love of his life… and while it may not forever be rainbows and pots of gold for him, there is purpose now and quite possibly hope.

    Keep writing. It’s therapeutic for the soul on so many different levels….

    • I read the thread. You’re right it was very difficult to read but I’m glad you shared it with me. I think it’s important for us to learn from things like this. Thank you for your comment.

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